do herpes really smell.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize