she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
id be glad to
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
That accounts for only three of the penises
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
