i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
