another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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