piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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