Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
