Texts From Last Night

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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?

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  (843): Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm? http://tfl.nu/fqw6
  Replies (1) Good night (795) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  my vagina has a 5:00 shadow

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  (407): my vagina has a 5:00 shadow http://tfl.nu/wj4u
  Replies (32) Good night (717) Bad night (4093)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.

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  (301): you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop. http://tfl.nu/0o9n
  Replies (19) Good night (7137) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"

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  (773): you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE" http://tfl.nu/hmmg
  Replies (17) Good night (6352) Bad night (1019)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?

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  (248): Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit? http://tfl.nu/e30d
  Replies (24) Good night (7056) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life

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  (646): in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life http://tfl.nu/n6il
  Replies (24) Good night (1121) Bad night (4347)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.

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  (201): He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me. http://tfl.nu/n6mr
  Replies (12) Good night (6523) Bad night (1047)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.

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  (715): I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you. http://tfl.nu/8i7d
  Replies (11) Good night (1133) Bad night (3844)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.

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  (704): I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying. http://tfl.nu/un4v
  Replies (25) Good night (1308) Bad night (9687)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.

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  (937): She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain. http://tfl.nu/rayu
  Replies (10) Good night (2527) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I need you to use more vowels.

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  (812): gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar (219): I need you to use more vowels. http://tfl.nu/cjfw
  Replies (15) Good night (8219) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  professor came back from spring break missing a tooth

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  (651): professor came back from spring break missing a tooth http://tfl.nu/mzcn
  Replies (8) Good night (7210) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.

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  (503): He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out. http://tfl.nu/qidl
  Replies (6) Good night (3054) Bad night (899)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.

  (1-720): View more from Colorado

  You sound pretty unsure about all of this.

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  (720): I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses. (1-720): You sound pretty unsure about all of this. http://tfl.nu/jh6b
  Replies (5) Good night (2401) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.

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  (312): I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again. http://tfl.nu/ffgl
  Replies (0) Good night (247) Bad night (475)

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