I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I don't deserve a penis
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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