I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Randomize
