and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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