so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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