how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize