Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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