Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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