I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
it's like heaven, but drunker
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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