It's Friday. Sex?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Randomize