how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize