So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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