Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i came on her dog
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
