What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
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