He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
