Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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