Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
