I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
You did what with his pubic hair?
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