he referred to my room as the tit cave...
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
