let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
