Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
