you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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