Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize