so explain again why im purple
no
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
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