He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
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