therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
