i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
