every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
