Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I would fuck him just for his dog
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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