Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
The uberlube is also flammable
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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