Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
