Screwed.edu
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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