yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize