Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
