Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
