I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
