Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize