Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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