I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
