hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
