doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
