At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
