:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
