You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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