He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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